Honest Movie Posters Part 1: Six Packs and Loud Noises

Honest Movie Posters is a weekly post in which we look at a world where movie posters tell the honest truth about the movie it concerns

300

Prepare for six packs! Semi-Nude Men on a Suicide Mission


Transformers

No script, retarded plot, get ready for some...Loud Noises

Thanks to Chani over at listal.com

Insufficient Funds: Meat Boy

Insufficient Funds is a regular post in which we feature a free, or very close to it, piece of media that you can enjoy without overdrafting your bank account.

If a game has simple enough controls, then no matter how excrutiatingly difficult it is, you'll know it's your own fault when you meet your demise. Meat Boy operates on this principle to the absolute extreme limits. It can be soul-crushingly difficult, but you only kick yourself. And then go back... again, and again, and again.

It's a simple enough platformer -- left and right arrow keys to move, space bar to jump -- but it has all the charm in the world. You play as a big hunk of meat, trying to save the only girl that would ever accept you; one made from band-aids. And who has stolen your sweet from your embrace? None other than Dr. Fetus, a fetus in a jar, with a grown man's body and, inexplicably, wings.

But it's not only the ridiculous story that keeps you sucked in, the game is designed in such a way to give you a hearty slap on the back for encouragement, as it simultaneously chews you up and spits you out. Every level can be beaten in at least 30 seconds or less, if only you were that talented. And should you... when you, meet your untimely death, over and over again, the level instantly reloads itself, never letting you second guess a 54th... or 104th try.

And don't worry, once you are thoroughly in love with the constant stream of synchronous abuse and charm, there will be plenty of pain/delight for you to endure/enjoy. After the original Meat Boy, Edmund McMillen and Jonathan McEntee (Team Mic) gathered a collection of the most ridiculously brutal player created maps, and released the Meat Boy (Map Pack).

Let's just say you are the sick kind of masochist that can make it through all of the Map Pack. Never fear, because on the horizon is Super Meat Boy for WiiWare, which looks to take our 8-bit style hero into the 16-bit age. But that probably doesn't matter to you, because if you can make it through all of the Map Pack, then you most be a robot. And we all know that robots come from the future. So you've probably already played Super Meat Boy. How was it? Or... is it? Will it?

Trailer Park: January 29

Trailer Park is a weekly post, every thursday, where we feature trailers for the upcoming weekend movie releases.

Not much is out this week, but there are two films of note.

First up is Edge of Darkness. Starring Mel Gibson and Ray Winstone, it tells the tale of a hard-as-nails homicide detective who is investigating the death of his daughter. This being a movie, he of course uncovers a government plot and an agent is sent in to clean up the evidence. Expect plenty of twists in the plot, as it's written by William Monahan, the Oscar winning screenwriter of The Departed.



The other movie of note is When in Rome, starring Kristen Bell and Josh Duhamel. Bell is the young woman who is unlucky in love. She impulsively takes a handful of coins from a "fountain of love" in Rome, and then finds herself besieged by wannabe lovers who had previously thrown their coins into the fountain. Seems to be a fairly competent rom-com, one worthy of bringing a lady to.



Also out this week:
North Face

What will you be seeing?

Video Round-Up: What the What? Edition

Video Round-Up is a weekly post collecting an assortment of videos from around the web. Whether they be music videos, creative viral marketing, just plain cool, or just plain ridiculous, they will all be found on Video Round-Up.

Who remembers Trigger Happy TV? Any hands? Well, if you don't, go back in time and try learn about it; then return to now and recall it. It was an excellent show that aired for a couple of seasons on Comedy Central early in the aughts. Rife with furries, no doubt, the British comedy show also had altered-reality skits like the one above. I'm imagining a Trigger Happy version of the iPhone that he jumps on like the piano in Big.




Who has a weatherman this awesome? For a weatherman to win in the competitive field of old guys pointing at things and relying a bit too much on buttons, a certain degree of enthusiasm is requisite. However, this hype cannot be faked. On a serious note: a meteorologist like this can actually make me care about the personalities involved; like maybe I would watch the news instead of checking the temperature on Google. I won't miss you because I don't live anywhere near your broadcast, guy, but good job nonetheless!




Of all things--all things--that I expected to hear discussed in Alex's recent interview with Nick Suttner, ostrich racing was the last thing I--okay, ostrich racing is the last thing I expect to hear discussed under any circumstances. But lo and behold! Here emerges a home video, the magic of which was ruined by the conversation about posting it on youtube within the video. Anyway, I can't say it doesn't look like that one ostrich was abused in training, so feel free to debate that in the comments.




For readers who already watch 30 Rock, you probably recognized the title of this Round-Up. If you do not watch 30 Rock, do yourself a favor and start. It's all on Netflix so there's no excuse not to! It didn't appeal to me until years after its premiere, but the jokes are constant, fresh and appealing to the likes of me. Here are some clips that set the self-conscious tone for the show.




What's right about roosters and heavy metal combined? What isn't right? After watching this video you will agree.

Trailer Park: January 22nd

Welcome to Trailer Park, a weekly round-up of the latest movie releases.

One of this weeks biggest releases is Legion. The first film by directer Scott Stewart, and featuring Dennis Quaid and Paul Bettany. With Humanity's last hope, in unborn baby form, being protected by Archangel Micheal, expect some exhilarating angel on angel fight scenes. It doesn't look too shabby and only adds to the already awesome movie line-up for 2010.



This weeks other big release is Extraordinary Measures. Based on a true story and boasting a relatively all star cast of Brendan Fraser, Harrison Ford and Keri Russell. The plot centers on two parents journey to find a researcher who might be able to cure their two children's rare genetic disorder. Expect some heart wrenching moments and maybe some tears.



Also out this week

Tooth Fairy
Creation
To Save a Life

Jean Baudin Interview

Jean Baudin likes to push the limits of his instrument. Unsatisfied with the range he could achieve on his bass, he kept adding more strings to the mix. It's added a very unique sound to every one of his projects. The band he formed, Nuclear Rabbit, sounds like you're going down the rabbit hole to wonderland, only it is in a full-blown, post-apocalyptic, nuclear winter.

But Nuclear Rabbit's last CD came out in 2003, and there is no solid word on when a follow-up is coming. So Jean has occupied himself with solo work that is in the completely opposite direction. While his band transports you to a twisted fantasy world, his solo work strips away the rest of the world, and envelopes you with soothing, ambient sound.

It's a jump that some of his fans might not be able to make, but I was on board the second I heard both. Jean was nice enough to shoot some emails back and forth with me, and answer some of my burning questions. We talked about how he writes his music, why he made the jump in sound between Nuclear Rabbit and his solo music, video games and their influence on his music, and ostriches... always ostriches.

Read the interview here...

Dan's Internet Findings: Caldonia

I have a thing for old videos. Especially ones that feature really good music. In this case we have a real treat of a video. It's from the movie No Leave, No Love. The kid in the video is musician Sugar Chili Robinson. Not only is he extremely cute, but he's also very talented. The best part of the video is the last half. Enjoy.

Caldonia
by redhotjazz1

Top 5 Underdog Albums of 2009

Having gotten my obvious choices out of the way, it's now time for the albums that didn't quite make it. These 5 albums were all amazing, I just didn't think they were part of my Top 5 for the year. Still, attention they deserve, and attention they will get. So without further ado, I present my Top 5 underdog albums of 2009, in no particular order.

Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros - Self-Titled

Another All Songs Considered discovery for me. The album itself disappointed the show's host after he saw them live, but I loved it. They have a sort of band of hippies quality to them, but even though you were likely beaten down and brought to absolutely hate "hippies" with the resurgence of the trend this decade.

A clarification: The kids who wore Pink Floyd shirts and smoked pot in your high school weren't hippies. This band, is much closer to the title -- just a completely harmless, ragtag group of musicians. You can't help but find them adorable. And I'm not sure why I turned this into a whole conversation about hippies simply because the band reminds me of them, but I'm leaving it this way.

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My Top 5 Podcasts of 2009

I've never thought about ranking podcasts. To me, they occupy my time in two ways: either a podcast is interesting and informative, or it provides more non-diegetic sound while I play a video game or read. Either way I love podcasts and will use this opportunity to fill you in on some excellent shows that I've enjoyed this year. (Note: Only numbers 1 and 5 were created in 2009)

5. Active Time Babble

What is it? An offshoot of 1UP's Retronauts podcast, Active Time Babble is Jeremy Parish and Kat Bailey's new addition to the myriad of shows 1UP already has -- only this one is especially awesome. The title's pun should be obvious to RPG players, but if not it comes from the title for a common battle mechanic in JRPGs called "active time battle." The podcast therefore, naturally, concerns itself with all things role-playing, including (so they say) everything from Final Fantasy to western table-top games.

Why I love it: I've always enjoyed Parish and Bailey on their various podcasts and shows, and this one is no different. They are generally eloquent and concise speakers, so the "Babble" part isn't so much "meandering" as it is "dialog for a specific audience." Guests like Thierry Nguyen contribute interesting discussion as well. Simply put, if you like RPGs or video game conversation in general, you're bound to enjoy this one and learn something too!

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The Top 5 "Well, duh!" Albums of 2009

I'm not going to be anything but glaringly obvious in this list of my 5 favorite albums of 2009. If you know me at all, then these picks will be pretty straight-forward. Fortunately for most everyone, you don't know me very well, yet, and my top two choices are much different from those of the more mainstream music blogs.

I have ranked these, but let's be honest, it doesn't really matter. So, let's just jump right into it.

#5 - Grizzly Bear's Veckatimest

When Grizzly Bear buzz was at max for their last release I gave it a listen, I just could not get into it at all. I tossed it aside without even a second chance.

When I heard Two Weeks on All Songs Considered, though, I loved it. So I gave them a second chance with Veckatimest. Even as a someone who normally listens to pretty strange music to most, it took me a little while to permeate this album. Still, I found myself drawn back to it often.

Nowadays, it not only gets regular rotation, but their video for Ready, Able gets played constantly on YouTube when my nearly 2 year old daughter comes up to me while on the computer and wants to watch something. She is entranced by that video, almost as much as Shakira's gyrating hips, something I'd like to ween her off of in the near future.

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