Almost exactly two years ago Twitter finally clicked for me. I'd had it since the beginning of the year and had never bothered to check it or ever tweet anything, but with the Electronic Entertainment Expo looming I got an idea. I connected my phone to my account and started subscribing to people who might be sharing and talking about the announcements coming out of video games' biggest event of the year. It was the only way I could know what was going on at the show while I was at work, and it was the beginning of an addiction.
After E3 was over I started to use Twitter a little bit more since it was already tied to my phone. I shared random thoughts I had throughout the day and made stupid jokes but no one ever responded. It wasn't until the fall came around that I followed some actual people who I'd begun to know a bit through Bitmob, a gaming site I'd started frequenting when it launched in May of that year. Now I was starting to have actual exchanges with people via tweets and it took things to a whole new level.
As I added more real people and had more actual conversations, my heart grew increasingly fond of Twitter. I now loved the site and began tweeting much more frequently. I would constantly be thinking of ways to share whatever I'd just seen in a humorous way, or be voicing complaints that would normally be ignored. By early this year, I was out of hand. Twitter had become such a huge part of my life that I'd pretty much share everything. Nothing was off-limits, and it was likely just hurting me.
At least I didn't pull a Gottfreid.
Having this network of friends always at the ready, I couldn't stop myself from turning to them whenever I had any sort of thought or feeling, and with them all being a level removed from me (i.e. Not actually standing in front of me) I wasn't as shy about sharing personal things.
Sometime last week this whole situation really started to become clear to me. I was extremely proud of the handful of game journalists I had following me, as well as just the overall amount of followers, but I'm not sure they were ready to go on the emotional roller coaster ride that is my own personal head space. It was likely hurting my credibility, because while I desire to be a game journalist and this was a great opportunity to network with people who could help make that happen, they probably don't leap to hire people who come across as a little crazy sometimes.
You don't go into a job interview and talk about how you felt when your father made a remark about your parenting at the dinner table, but that is essentially what I had been doing. Not to mention all of those occasions when sharing only my side of an argument to my feed caused friction with the people who had been made the bad guys without the chance to defend themselves.
They're tweeting about how much fun they are having together.
It needed to stop, and maybe someone with better willpower would have been able to just stop sharing so much, but when I'm at work by myself for five straight hours a day I can't help but start sending out messages. So, I deleted it all. Those years of building up a network of contacts and friends were suddenly gone, and I can't begin to tell you how much I miss it right now.
Maybe that's sad, because it's just a profile on some website, right? That was true back in the day, but in the social networking age each site is on an entirely new level of our minds. Commenting on profiles and sending email-like messages gave way to chat features, which gave way to up-to-the-minute stream of consciousness-like feeds of our every thought. Something about following along with someone's life so closely really connects us.
I've heard it argued many times that the constant barrage of almost meaningless updates just makes people tune out, but since I had all of them coming in as text messages to my phone I pretty much read every single one. As a result, I'm pretty attached to everyone I followed on Twitter. I know a lot about them, and I care a lot about them. And once you're to that point it's almost impossible to break the cycle of constant updates -- but is that cycle hurting us? Is it causing us to disconnect with the real world and create a new reality in the virtual realm? It's hard to tell, I guess. Probably best left to each person and their individual situations.
"...to my 17 followers, 15 of which are pornbots -- because nobody who wears t-shirts with "jokes" on them is interesting."
For me, I needed to press reset on my social networking life. I need to break all of my habits and relearn how to use Twitter in an appropriate manner. Removing that attachment I had to my follower count was the first step, but now I have to stay away long enough that I stop feeling the need to share anything and everything. Maybe then I can start back from scratch, strictly manage the people I follow, and tweet responsibly. I'm not sure what the future of social networking is, and how we will be affected from using it, but I had the harsh realization that it was negatively affecting me and I had to make a change before I was in too deep.
How do you feel? Do you value your experiences on social networking sites or do they negatively impact your real-life relationships?
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2 comments:
Your tweets will be missed, but I can understand your reasoning behind it. I've felt similarly, at times. When I first started using Twitter, I didn't tweet all that much -- mostly just impressions on games or brief conversations with other people, but as time went on, I began to speak my mind more often and also brought other parts of my life online. I noticed that it turned people off and even made some angry, so I get what you're saying. I don't think doing that is wrong necessarily, but of course there is that risk of losing people who were formerly friends. Maybe it's best to keep certain things private sometimes, but it's also nice to have a safe place to speak your mind without serious repercussions (unless you're famous, of course). I personally think our society would be a lot better if people could speak openly about things that are bugging them, but that's just me.
Anyway, I hope some time off from Twitter will make it a more pleasant experience if you later decide to return. It must feel weird being away since you used it so often in the past. I know I've felt the urge to check it on my phone even though I seldom tweet anymore. I definitely miss it, but it doesn't feel as comfortable, and it's not as fun without my favorite Bitmobbers around.
As someone who only recenty began to interact with you on twitter I will miss ya. I understand your reasons though, your relationship with twitter is shockingly similar to mind to an extent. I have always been aware of sharing too much though, especially once I started being followed by "real life" people.
Personally I can't see myself giving up twitter any time soon unless something drastic forces me to. Outside of having an interesting insight into what people I admire/respect/etc are thinking I've found twitter has let me into a world filled with lots of grea people. I enjoy interacting with people I've developed relationships with. We've become friends of sorts, knowing likes and dislikes of each and sharing thoughts, links and whatever with each knowing it will interest the other. I love being connected to all these people I otherwise woul have no way to meet or speak to.
Look forward to you rejoining the fold at some point. Great write up too.
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