Nintendo Announces the DSiXXL

With the recent announcement of the DSi XL, gamers thought that maybe Nintendo's mind was with it's new casual audience instead of the core gamer. Well, apparently that was the exact case. As of this morning, a leaked press release was dug up from the depths of the Internet, that seems to confirm all of our worst nightmares. Indeed, Nintendo is only thinking about the casual audience they have created, but they seem to be going completely overboard with it. Just read this absolutely insane press release yourself.

Nintendo brought gaming into the living rooms of millions of families with the Nintendo Entertainment System. They defined the handheld gaming market with the Gameboy. They were the first to launch gaming into the modern age with the 64 bit Nintendo 64. They released the Gamecube. And they revolutionized the way we controlled our games with the Nintendo Wii.

Now, they are excited to announce the exciting 5th iteration, in as many years, of the world's best selling portable video game system. The Nintendo DSi XXL, will set the adult market ablaze when it is released on the day that the Nintendo DSi XL sales start to wane.

"One of the things we heard the most from the demographic we managed to capture with the Wii, in regards to our line of handhelds, was I can't see what's happening on this thing," said Reggie Fils-Aime, Nintendo of America president. "The DSi XXL was built with them in mind. They should have no trouble following the action on screen now that it is the size of their torso's. Plus, the new XXL stylus will help those with impaired handling, since it is as big as one of those giant novelty pencils you might get at a theme park or something."

Some of the features available out of the box include, a built-in pill organizer, a timer -- so you don't miss a business meeting, soccer game, or pill -- and a variety of game-themed calendars and clocks (for scheduling your business meetings, children's soccer games, or doctors appointments).

Games for the DSi XXL will be catered to your playing tastes. Numerous games, such as Solitaire, Sudoku, and Tetris, will be available at launch. Plus, the DSi XXL will be able to play all existing Nintendo DS games. When these games are put into the DSi XXL, they will automatically go into what Nintendo likes to call "No Need to Try" mode. In this mode, the game will instantly correct the mistakes you make, by simply doing the right thing instead.

"We are really excited to get this out on the market," commented Cammie Dunaway, Nintendo of America's executive vice president of Sales & Marketing. "My kids have been playing with a prototype at home and they just love it. My youngest likes to turn it upside down and lay underneath it when he plays."

The Nintendo DSi XXL will release next spring, in Avocado Green and Pumpkin Orange, and will retail for $299.99 MSRP. Additional features and news will be made available prior to release. Be sure to keep your eye on http://www.nintendodsixxlisreallyawesome.com/ for more details.

This is a startling realization of what the future of video games might be like if Nintendo keeps its lead on the competitors. Personally I'm a little disgusted and scared. What do you think?